Another Trinity

If I am truly honest, what has been missing in my life is the inability to trust myself. Always, there is an authority. Always, there is someone to become like, something to change, something to control, and always, there is the comparative mind, the mind that says this is better than that, this is preferable to that. In a word, there is judgment. Judgment, and nothing more, prevents the possibility of radical acceptance. It prevents the possibility of being comfortable in your own skin. It prevents feeling connected to others. It creates adversity, polarity and the world of black and white.

The very thing spirituality is meant to effect, judgment prevents, and religion and spirituality are often crippled by it. There is judgment about presence, judgment about absence, judgment about the seen and unseen, and of course there is the wish to become something other than we are. This non-acceptance is by nature combative. It is war. It is an out and out rejection of what is. Judgment and non-acceptance are two sides of the same coin. Non-acceptance feeds judgment. Judgment feeds becoming, and becoming continues the non-acceptance. Where are we running to? What are we running from? Have we looked at this relationship, the interconnectedness of this other trinity? Have we looked at the trinity of judgment, non-acceptance and the wish to "become"?

Beneath it all is this belief: I'm not Ok as I am. You're not Ok as you are. Let's be different. Perhaps you could become like me, or I could become like you. Nothing is every loved, just rejected. This is what perpetuates the self-help machine. This is what creates the combativeness and the conflict, both within and without, and religion and spirituality have become part of this machine. They have crippled love. The idea of God, saints and sinners, believers and unbelievers, enlightened and unenlightened, awake and asleep have crippled the free mind.

If we read between the lines there is superiority and inferiority. There is chosen and not-chosen. There is God loves you, but... God loves you, if... or God loves you, when... Likewise. there is I love you, but... I love you, if... I love you, when... Neither human relationships, nor our projection of divine relationships measure up to this radical acceptance of a free mind.