Misunderstanding

There is no such thing as a conditioned self. This is language only. It is a concept only. Self is always unconditioned and free. If any, these are the proper qualities to ascribe. All the rest, conditioning, is just information that is accessible. It might be positive information or negative. Ultimately, it doesn't matter. It is not you. It is purely accidental. It may be purposeful, but it is always accidental. All of it comes, and all of it goes. This is the meaning of accidental as opposed to essential. This is what is meant by illusion instead of ultimate Reality. The ultimate Reality abides. It abides eternally.

It is not even accurate to say that a part of you which is eternal abides and the other part comes and goes. You have no parts. You are utterly simple. What comes and goes is not you. That's the whole point. All these varied experiences, and still you remain as you have always been, untouched, unchanged, unaffected, as a fish swimming through water. That is the awakening. Seeing this truth, what is known as realization, is an opportunity to call into question both what you have been calling you and what you have been referring to you.

Truth is utterly mysterious and has no self-reference. Only the known can be referenced. Only information can be referenced. You are essentially unknowable. Thus, whatever you take yourself for, you mistake yourself for. That is what the ego is, a mistaken identity. In Reality, you are not this, that or the other. You are not angry, depressed, anxious or afraid. Neither are you the opposite. None of it applies to you. That is the freedom. That is the liberation. You are and always have been, throughout the creative process and before, free of all identification with what is fixed, with what is limited, with what is affected, with what needs to be "fixed." You don't need to be fixed. Just clear up the basic misunderstanding, and don't again mix it up.

Oneness does not imply mixed up, neither is integration collecting or compiling stray information. It is not owning or reifying what is conceptual and gathering it into a unified whole. Whatever can be joined or pieced together can also fall apart. That's not it. That is neither simple nor natural. Rather, integration is abiding as That which is intrinsically simple, and as That, meeting what is not, or at least what does not appear to be, from a limited self-identified perspective.